Wednesday, February 12, 2014


So Anonymous says (sic):
"Don't you think you are asking alot from a school? I fele very sorry for you and know your son needs extra care and attention but it sounds like the school is doing the best it can. Teachers are overwhelmed just dealing with kids without special needs. We ask too much of our teachers and admins. I do hope things improve for you and Andrew."

So I reply:  
Jenny said...
In most school districts classes - especially in a class with three or four children with special needs they have an aid. In NY Andrew always stood next to the aid during transition times. I'm not asking for one on one attention  I'm asking for common sense. If he breaks down during line up stand next to the teacher or aid. And I've volunteered to be an aid to help out. They take volunteers at the school. Andrew's teacher is amazing. The admin is amazing. But we've had to go through seven months of hell before we can start the classification process again to get him extra help. It's the school district that lacks common sense. Are people so overwhelmed they can't have someone stand next to them? Don't leave a comment without leaving your name. I know who you are anyway.

I've thought about this all morning.  YES, I do expect a lot from the school.  YES, I do expect each child - every, single child to be safe and be afforded the same education.  YES, I do expect that when a child has autism, ADHD, OCD, bipolar disease, Downs Syndrome, Cerebral Palsy - any issues whatsoever, that in the GREATEST FUCKING COUNTRY IN THE WORLD - that that child is given what he needs.  
If it requires that an adult be close to him during transitions so that he doesn't hurt another child with a push or a harsh word - YES.  How the holy fuck do you think it makes me feel when he hits or hurts another child?  It makes me feel like death - yes - death.  I feel like a part of me dies every fucking time he does something wrong.
What if your child was pushed or hurt because my child misinterpreted something - would you expect your child to be protected?  Should my child be home schooled - which EVERY SINGLE ONE of Andrew's health care providers screams NO.  Do you want my child to turn into Adam Lanza?  Do you want my child to be isolated and abandoned by a society that helps every fucking country in the world?  I am mad - yes - I'm mad because Anonymous doesn't have the common courtesy to leave her name.  She can disagree with me - but do so with a face.  Not in a cowardly faceless way.  
I have great respect for teachers and school staff.  But in this day and age everyone no matter what the job complains that they are overworked and underpaid.  I would give my left arm to work again.  Before Andrew I was a paralegal but I would work in a grocery store - putting sprinkles on a donut for eight hours a day.  I worked from the time I was 9 years old - helping neighbors with housework for money, when I was 11 I was cleaning the nun's home - for money - which was given to my father for bills.  I worked three jobs for many years to make ends meet and to support my family.

I haven't worked since Andrew was born - how can I hold a job when I'm being called repeatedly throughout the day or week to pick up my child.  I can't - no employer wants that.  I wanted to work in the evenings but Jim's call schedule didn't allow it and basically Jim won't allow it.  He's right - I'm mentally and physically exhausted now and I do have a job.  MY JOB is to make sure my child is safe and cared for.   My job is to teach my child not to act out in anger.  My job is to control my lupus and other medical conditions so I can make sure Andrew is cared for. 

SO YES, Anonymous, I do expect a lot for my child and every other child.  


Pam said...

Well said Jenny, I have a serious problem with people who hide behind a computer screen. I would put more thought into their words if they had the balls to say give their name. You know that they have probably never said anything to a person face to face. Those are the people you can not trust they are never true.

The US schools are failing all of our children, we have kids you don't have the academics to get into college then we put such a high price tag on college that they are in debt for half of their lifetime.

Then you take a child with special needs and don't think they deserve the same resources is the same as saying lets just lock them away where society doesn't have to know this problem exists.

Until someone has a special needs child they will not understand the situation fully. Jenny my had is off to you and all you do for Andrew and Jim. I will never fully understand what you are going through but my heart goes out to you and the 1,000's of parents dealing with the heartbreak that goes not daily.

Katrina said...

This makes me so sad and sick.
You do have the most important job. Be strong. I was going to say don't give in to what everyone tries to tell you--but you totally won't, duh.
<3 U

Janis said...

Dear Fuck Head "Anonymous"
You probably don't know me but I know you. You are that person that acts caring and "wants the best" for everybody. You give advice and your opinion freely. You are ignorant. First off, nobody asked for your opinion. Second, you are a fucking coward for not giving your name. Third, no one said anything about poor teachers not having a hard job. I can just imagine what your expectations would be from a teacher ( but THAT is different). Why don't you keep your stupid ass, unempathetic, thoughts to your "Anonymous" self. I detest dickwads like you.

Bev Babarovich said...

I hope Anonymous gets some much needed help. With a heart AND a brain two sizes too small, life must be a challenge.

Renee Goerger said...

This is all just terribly sad. So terribly sad.
Renee - Kudos Kitchen

Shelby Law Ruttan said...

Like Pam, I have a problem with people who hide behind a computer screen. What are you hiding for other than the fact that you know that you are more than likely wrong. Jenny, you have a right to your thoughts, feelings, and I for one, admire you for the fact that you CARE. Anonymous can kiss my ass. They don't have a clue without walking in your shoes.

chefjess21 said...

Anyone who leaves a comment as "anonymous" OBVIOUSLY already knows they are being a complete C U Next Tuesday, and thinks they can "hide" behind anon. Complete bull shit. How about people just don't say such nasty vial shit, especially when they know why shouldn't? Take a lesson from Disney, "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all" Regardless of whatever the text of her comment was, said person STRAIGHT UP KNEW they shouldn't be writing it.
You school system is failing you Jenny, you know this, I know this. We know this because it is clearly evident! That's a rant for another time. This person should just crawl in a hole and stay there alone until they pull the stick out of their ass.
I love you Jenny, we all love you. Fuck this anon asshole, she/he already knows what a POS they are, otherwise they would have had the balls to write a name.